Anyway, a week before my due date I was hoping to have gone into labor already and my last two appointments before my due date left me in tears with news that the baby hadn’t dropped, I wasn’t showing any signs of going into labor and I began to fear that my body didn’t know how to go into labor on it’s own and that I was going to end up with a scheduled c-section. I was told to come in on my due date and have a NST and then they would check me and asses what they were going to do. So I went in, baby sounded fabulous, and they checked and I was 1cm and 40% effaced, so they said they would leave me till the 13th and then break my water. I was excited and left with high hopes for the week ahead. I talked to my Doula, Lola, and she asked if I would be up for trying Castor Oil on Tuesday to see if that wouldn’t help, so I agreed.
So Tuesday morning, 5:30am I was awake and decided to just go for it. It makes me feel really sick just to write this, I can’t believe I got that stuff down, but I did. Within an hour I felt nauseous and just awful all over. Castor Oil is thought to take 4 to 5 hours to kick in so I figured it could be a long day. Well, not much happened by noon besides feeling gross all over so I took a nap and figured that it wasn’t working for me.
Fast forward to 4pm and I got one major strong contraction. I didn’t think much of it till I got another one shortly after, and then another until I realized they were every two minutes and I was having a hard time walking or talking through them. Called Brian and my Doula to give them a heads up. By 5 I asked Lola to come over because I didn’t think I was handling the pain all that well and she came and told me to take a bath and see what happened. Well, nothing changed so we decided to go into the local hospital to get checked before driving an hour to the city where I was supposed to deliver. (I was considered high risk because I wanted a vbac and they are short on doctors here in town so they didn’t want me to deliver here)
Enter stage chaos!! We got to the local hospital and encountered the ruddest nurse I have ever met in my life who gave Brian a hard time for bringing me in and made sure we knew that the didn’t do vbac’s there and why didn’t we just go to the city. I think she would have rather me deliver in the car then have it there. She was truly awful and if we would have been there 5 more minutes I would have asked her to leave the room and never come back in. Anyway, this was about 5:30 -6pm and I was 5cm and in active labor with contractions every 2min coming fast and hard. They started to get concerned I wouldn’t make it the hour to the hospital but decided in the end to send me by ambulance. All this time rude nurse barked orders, stabbed (ok maybe not stabbed, but she was evil) me with a second unneccessary IV which was never used, yelled at Lola, snapped at Brian while they tried to help me labor and just all around was awful. So I was happy to see the ambulance crew and get out of there before I blew up at rude nurse.
Ambulance ride was super bumpy, but we got there in 36min, which is great. Better then the old winstar could have done. :)
Anyway, I lost all track of time while I was in labor. I would classify myself as somewhat of a train wreck. lol. I think that comes from expecting it to be like labor with Theo and it turns out it’s a whole other ball game when your child is actually putting pressure on your cervix and coming out. I was not prepared for that kind of pain, and I don’t think I handled it well, I was not impressed with myself. :) So anyway, when I got to this hospital they broke my water almost right away and things continued to move quickly and I think it was around 10pm that my body started pushing, and I was almost 10cm. I pushed for close to two hours and baby just would move down a bit while I was pushing and then go back up again when I stopped, so not much was being accomplished. There are a few things that stand out in my mind during this period of labor. The first is that my husband was SO helpful. I know I shouldn’t be surprised, but he really hates hospitals, and seeing me in pain, but he really stayed focused and with it and let me squeeze the life out of his hand, (which he thought I was going to break at one point). The second was how thankful I was to have Lola there. To have the presence of a woman who understands labor and can look at you when you are in pain and say that they understand, and know that it is true, but who can help keep you focused and try and get you to pull it together, it was just invaluable. Not to mention that she was also able to suggest different things for me to try so that I really felt like I was able to give labor my best shot. Best doula ever. :) The last thing I remember is how chaotic that room felt all the time. It was far from a relaxing. In Lola’s words it was like they were waiting for my uterus to erupt at any minute. It was kind of frustrating how uptight everybody seemed, they were nice, but uptight. I had a nurse pushing something into my stomach every contraction to get a read on they baby’s heart rate, even though it was perfect the whole labor, they refused to take the monitor’s off. I think it would be safe to say that Brian and Lola were the only ones in the room focused on helping me try to get the birth I wanted. It was really too bad.
The doc came in around 11:45 I think and suggested it was time for a c-section. (This doctor was the one that was on call and he was a whole other story. Horrible bedside manner, beverly hills smile (Brian’s terminology), laughed a lot, wasn’t helpful at all, I could go on, but I won’t. :)) After talking to Lola and Brian we concluded that this was probably going to be the way it was going to have to be. So within half an hour they had me in surgery. The spinal couldn’t come fast enough at that point, there is nothing like having to push for another 20min knowing that it’s not doing you any good. I was happy to be able to be awake this time and to hear Soren cry when he came out and to see him and kiss his sweet cheeks. When Dr. Horrible Bedside Manners pulled him out all I heard was ‘This kid is a giant!!’. Soren was born at 12:25, August 11, 2010 and was 10lbs 9oz and 21 1/2in long. He has a full head of dark thick hair and is just the cutest chunky newborn ever. He eats like a champ, (at 2 weeks is about 11lbs 5oz.) sleeps like a champ and we are so in love with him.
Some of the best moments ever!
I would have to say that I am of course disappointed that I had a c-section but not in the way I was with Theo. I am so thankful that I got the opportunity to really labor, to push, to feel like I gave it every effort that I could. The disappointment comes more from having to have a surgery, again, and feeling like I didn’t get to give my baby the least traumatic entry into the world and that I didn’t get to feel the satisfaction of having him placed on my chest right away. And oh the pain of a c-section. The recovery is long and hard for me, was the first time, feels even a bit worse this time. I have cried many a time in the last week and a half about the pain that makes it impossible for me to get out of bed without help, unable to wear my baby in a wrap for a while, unable to pick up my firstborn for anything, to get outside much because I can’t do 3 flights of stairs very well. But to hold a newborn, one that is perfectly healthy and eats and sleeps well, that is bliss. And I try to hold on to that in the hard moments, and be thankful that he is here, safe and sound, blessing us with his presence. Soren is my Samuel that I prayed earnestly for and had to learn to wait on God’s timing but God as been merciful to grant us this blessing and we are thankful!
Oh, and the name Soren is one that we had picked for him a year before we even knew he was on the way. We just both loved it right away when we saw it in a baby name book and that it is not super common and sounds masculine. It means thunder, or war. His middle name Cameron is named for Brian’s older brother who died at the age of one from mistakes made in the hospital. It is a sad story, but we wanted to honor his memory.
Thank you to all those who have prayed for me and supported me, as I waited on the Lord to even get pregnant, that felt like a long journey, to praying that I would get the delivery I wanted and that we would have a healthy baby. I am so thankful for the women that God has brought into my life in the last couple years and appreciate so much all the love and support and prayer being offered up on my behalf. I pray I can be such a friend to others.
Love these boys!
