Ha - so much for blogging once a week, it's been like almost 3 months!! Yikes.
Well, the big news is that I am pregnant. Praise God from whom all blessings flow! I keep wanting to say that God is so good in giving us a child, but I know in my heart that he would still be a good God without giving us another child. So we thank him for who he is and for his gifts to us that we are so undeserving of.
Life has been busy. And pregnancy turns me into a different person. One I don't really like. The pregnant me has no energy, ever, and feels nauseous every afternoon and evening, for almost 9 months. (at least with the last one, this shows no sign of letting up at 4 months here, so I expect it will be the same) The pregnant me never invites people over. Pregnant me never writes or calls people back. (Well, to be honest I am TERRIBLE at that in the first place, it's just even worse now.) Pregnant me exposes all those areas where I lack motivation and self-discipline and accentuates my selfishness to like the millionth degree and I am left feeling like a failure most days. This is all very hard to say because I want children like a fat kid wants a smartie, or like a fish wants (I guess needs) water. I want a whole house bursting full of them. And my excitement over this next baby just overwhelms me sometimes. I am excited about labor and about holding this little one. BUT I don't do pregnancy well, and I just need to learn how to live being pregnant, because something isn't working and I am not a fun person to be married to or be friends with when I am pregnant.
Anyway, all that to say I am excited/have a lot to work on these days, so I will press on and pray that each day will make me more like Christ. My hubby needs the computer, so I will write again another day, and hopefully not 3 months from now. :)
